I admit, I’m one of that kind of girlfriend. I means, I can’t help it but I’m full of negative thoughts on my mind.
“What if he doesn’t like this?”
“What if he’s angry on me?”
“What if he’s pissed off me?”
“What if……… what if……… what if………..”
I found that I’m being so so so much insecure that I eventually hurt my another half. Like seriously, who would be happy over a pessimist girlfriend (ironically sigh)? In times, I made him speechless that he technically doesn’t feel like answering to my questions. I know, it can’t be help. I can keep it on for once, twice, a month but not forever. I can’t keep showering my another half with my negativity. Honestly, I’m timid and scare. It’s the feeling of scare being hated and unlove. Hence I’m the super overly-thinking pessimistic girlfriend that always bugs him with stupid and brainless questions. Will he get bored someday? I’m afraid. I’m really afraid… I threw him on cold silent moment for times. I know I’m being childish. But I hate this cold silent moment. I wanted him to turn back and coax me. I know I’m being so selfish that I only thought about myself and not us.
The things between us two are no longer just you and I. It’s “us”. I’ll always make sure I keep it that in mind before I start to do anything selfish again.
I’m a mind controller!!!
P/S: Wonder what will he reacts on this post hmm..